You’ll probably wonder what I’m trying to say or even if the title has a typo. It doesn’t have any errors and I am not a masochist either.
I just want to share with you a very precious lesson that travelling taught me.
Learn how to love
I was asked during some interviews, before I started my trip, “What will you do if you’ll fall in love?”. My first reaction, then, was to laugh and tell “Dunno, I’ll see when it happens”. My laughter was me thinking that it’s impossible to fall in love while travelling.
I don’t know what was going through my mind 2 years ago. Either I was extremely naïve or my ego was huge. Either way, I was as wrong as I could ever been.
While traveling I fell in love. Hard! And a lot!
It was wonderful, magical, exciting, new and…. heartbreaking!
Of course, right? Once you fall in love, when the relationship ends you will, naturally, have your heart broken.
This will happen more often at the beginning, if you will travel for long time. This doesn’t mean it won’t happen later, you’ll just learn how to cope with it and how to love.
I really think I learned how to truly love during my travels.
Before my trip I had a totally different view about what love is. Probably my concept of love was pretty similar to yours, so I won’t discuss that. What I will discuss instead is how I see love now.
For me “love” means appreciating and being happy for the fact that it is! Love is not about possession or not even about similarities. Love is about discovering beauty and about not judging and analyzing. It’s about taking whatever comes, as it is!
One thing that I absolutely love about traveling is that it forces you to take people for granted, for what they are “now”. You just meet someone in a specific moment and environment and you take them as they are. You don’t know anything about his/her past and that is amazing! In fact, you’ll see that it doesn’t even matter.
Love is being in the moment and appreciating what you have “now”!
Love is not just for one partner
Now I am at one moment in my life when I realized that “love” is not something that you feel for just one partner. It’s totally shareable and indivisible. No, this is not a contradiction! You can love a thousand partners with all your heart and that doesn’t mean you would love only one 1000 times harder if you would discard the other 999. You love each of them at the same and it’s possible. At least for me!
I know how strange this sounds and I experienced the difficulty of explaining this to some of my friends. I hope you’ll understand what I am trying to say.
I especially used the word “partner” because you will fall in love not only with people. You will fall in love with places, smells, views and food.
It might sound silly when you read this, but trust me after you’ll fall for those things there’s no coming back. Now you’ll think: “Come on! How can a place or SMELL break my heart?”. You’ll see when you’ll be there. Don’t say you were not warned!
You’ll love having your heart broken
If you got so far now you’ll think I went crazy. I am not a masochist!
I stand by every word I’ve written so far because I know what I’m saying. The difference between us is that our concepts about love and being heartbroken are very different.
As I said before, I fell, I am and I will fall in love a lot. And I am so grateful and excited about this. I never know when will be the next time when I’ll say “Oh, shit! I’m in love again!”. This gives me a lot of power and energy. It makes me see the beauty in the other person or place or whatever it is that I’m falling for.
This thing teaches me to live in the moment. To appreciate every second that I am sharing with the other and not think about how long we will share the moment. It could be a minute, an hour or a month. Who cares? I care only about that moment!
And when the inevitable moment of “breaking up” comes, I feel happy because I’ve got the chance to share amazing experiences and moments with someone. The pain of loss is there, but it’s just an ego thing because our egos tell us to possess and control and so on…
Traveling will teach you many things. Some you’ll learn very easy and pain-free, but some will feel like you’re in a washing machine on full spin-cycle. It will be fun, hard, painful, smooth, but in the end all of it will be empowering!
I hope you’ll fall in love and get your heart broken in the same way as I do!
Let me know when was the last time you experienced something like this!